Under the vagina tree (pt 3)

Richardson Grove, CA Sept 8-14, 2009

Day 1 (conclusion): After such a long and involved day, I know I was looking forward to getting some rest. Surrounded in darkness or what Spongebob might call “advanced darkness”, I lay very still. The owls were out already. They don’t really “hoo!” like you are led to believe when you are a kid. The first time I heard a real owl, I thought there was a coyote or dog nearby howling. Every once in awhile you were aware of the freeway in the far distance because the big semi trucks would rattle as they hugged the corners on the mountain.I thought about the day. I thought about my anxieties as well. Was it worth it? Was it really all worth it? The palm of my burnt hand was still exceptionally warm. I closed my eyes and passed out.

That night I had a “lucid dream”.. I had this same dream last year when we were camping and swore up and down that it was real only because it moved so seamlessly back into my waking life. Only last year, the dream wasn’t so frightening. In this dream, I awoke inside my tent to a noise outside it. There was an animal lurking about very close to my tent; so close, I could hear it sniffing. I lay motionless. I could feel every beat of my heart and I was sure the animal could hear my heaving breathing. I tried to stifle it by holding my breath but that proved to be pointless. I tried to tell myself that it was just a raccoon scavenging for food or perhaps it was another camper’s dog that got loose in the night and was just sniffing around. The thought eased my mind for a bit and I tried to ignore it. But this “animal” would not be ignored. It actually pushed its body against my tent making the walls on the inside bulge. My eyes widened in the night as I could see this shadowy darkness protrude into my space. I shut my eyes hard. Because I remembered as a kid, monsters couldn’t harm you if you were asleep or if it thinks you are asleep. I didn’t know what else to do. It continued to push against my tent. It even went so far at one point that it touched me. I could feel some sort of appendage resting on my chest; I imagined it to be some massive paw. I was sure it could feel me breathing and at any moment it was going to go crazy trying to make its way inside my tent. My body stiffened and I thought about screaming or yelling, but I decided to wait until it was absolutely necessary. I awoke suddenly because I thought I did hear someone yell. Was that me? Did I yell? I looked around and realized that it was only a dream. Or was it? I listened. Silence. God! I hope its close to sunrise! It’s so cold! I awoke on my back, completely paralyzed, stiff as a board. Knowing full well that it was dream but scared shit-less, I didn’t move again till morning.